Making Contact

By Lauren Pritchard-Gordon

So you uploaded a clear, flattering photograph of yourself, smiling against the backdrop of a beautiful location.

You wrote a positive, witty, well-thought-out profile. Now all you need to do is capture the heart of the date of your dreams with that all-important first email.

But how? Don’t worry, our Date Doctor is on hand to help you write the perfect email to ensure cupid’s cyber-bow hits the right spot first time. Use the tips below to set the ink flowing from your virtual pen. So Search for single people in your area and get messaging!

Don’t play the numbers game.
Our research shows that members who send ‘standard’ block emails to umpteen members at once have little dating success. We can all spot these offenders a mile off, and they’re the ultimate turn off. Make the person you are emailing feel like ‘the only person in the room’. There’s nothing more flattering to facilitate the chemical connection.

Read the recipient’s profile first.
Rule of thumb before emailing anyone is to take time to read over his/her profile. It shows courtesy, and above all, interest in them as a person. Take a look at some of our Success Stories, many of which began by the simple reading of a profile.

Don’t ramble.
Introduce yourself in more detail by all means, elaborating somewhat on your profile (though be careful not to replicate it), but avoid writing reams and reams about yourself. This type of email will appear arrogant and might only end up boring the person reading it!

Ask questions.
Remember, it is only polite to ask the person about him/herself. Pick out hobbies/tastes that they’ve mentioned in their profile and ask them to elaborate. Better still, if they’ve referred to, let’s say, a particular film, which you have also seen, ask them what their favourite scene was and why, in turn explaining which scene was the most memorable for you.

Don’t be too hasty.
If you’re overwhelmingly attracted to someone’s photo, it can be hard to resist the temptation to throw yourself at him/her (albeit electronically)! But remember that holding back is often the best way to spark their interest. People can be insulted by the ‘being too forward, too soon’ approach, because you haven’t taken the time to get to know them properly.

Avoid ‘gushing’ emails.
By all means, pay your recipient a compliment or two, but don’t go overboard however much you like their photo, because you don’t know them as a person yet. Too many compliments on their physical appearance will make them think you’re only after one thing which of course you’re not!

Don’t be blinded by the computer glare.
It is important to remember the unwritten rules of dating. Although they aren’t as obvious when you’re hidden behind a computer screen, they are still very much there. So don’t write anything you wouldn’t say if you were face-to-face with your dream date.

Hopefully our Date Doctor has given you enough fuel to launch a creative, interesting, and most importantly, interested email into cyberspace. Well what are you waiting for? Login and get writing!

Start your search